Say ‘No’!

‘There is only one success – to be able to spend your life in your

own way.’

Christopher Morley

While working towards your goal, you may come across people who
may not share your priorities. People may demand more than what you
can offer. You may not get the support you need from others.
You may be an excellent person in terms of planning and scheduling
your appointments. However, if you suffer from the inability to say
‘NO’, all your plans may become unrealistic since you will not be able to
handle interruptions.

Many people mistake saying ‘NO’ as refusal. But the ability to say
‘NO’ is a critical attribute of ‘assertiveness’. Assertiveness means being
honest with oneself and at the same time accepting others as they are.
It is the ability to handle interruptions and say ‘NO’ to unreasonable
and impossible requests. Even after saying ‘NO’ you do not damage
interpersonal relationship and maintain a good rapport.

To be submissive is to surrender your rights and not stand up for
your own views. Aggressiveness means always wanting to win and
not recognising that others may also have legitimate rights of their
own. Assertiveness falls into the category between submissiveness and
aggressiveness. Just like any other skill, assertiveness can be developed.

Today think of the number of occasions you were aggressive,
submissive and ponder if you could have been more assertive.
(From my book 'The Gift of Time')
N C Sridharan
www.thetimefoundation.com
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